Genuinely Detached

In episode 28 of the Montgomery & Co podcast, the ladies are joined by heptathlete Chari Hawkins.
Hawkins shares how she trains for seven different track and field events, including days where the
entirety of her workout regimen can take up to nine hours. She also discussed her mental health
journey, “The reason why I became such an advocate for mental health and mental strength is because I
felt I didn’t have any,” Hawkins told the ladies on the podcast. She mentioned how her parents’ support,
while warming and necessary, can overshadow the times when she is struggling mentally. She said that
her anxiety was so bad in college that she attempted to tear her Achilles’ tendon just so no one would
be mad at her for failing in competition. This is where she had her, “Are you okay” moment,
contemplating injury rather than telling someone that she was not okay. Eventually, Hawkins grew to
accept that she wanted to change how she was feeling. “I told my parents that I’m not going to feel this
way again,” Hawkins said. After asking everyone she knew if they had anxiety, one response stuck out to
her that she decided to use:

“I detach myself from my performance.”

Professional athletes are different, mentally. There is a measure of sacrifice and commitments towards
excelling in sports that more than most people choose not to pursue. The hours, the physical grind, the
mental strain is something that most do in order to recreationally be in “good shape.” Pros are looking
to improve upon whatever physical gifts they already have and are willing to push those gifts as far as
they can—and, should they get injured, commit to the difficulties involved with recovery and
rehabilitation. This is all in the pursuit of the highest achievement in competition—winning.
The result is the most tangible part of sports. The box score gives the rundown of things like stats and
times but it always leads with who won and who lost. Consider what I briefly laid out as a professional
athlete’s regimen and how that regimen takes up most of their lives. Performance is literally how they
sustain livelihood. It opens doors to bigger contracts, endorsements, celebrity—and those things are in
jeopardy should performance start to slip.

However, and this is where non-athletes who are professionals elsewhere can relate, performance at
work does not dictate who you are as a person. Hawkins remarked, “Are you only a good person when
you do well?” Now, we know that isn’t true for anyone, but it is very difficult to fully apply it when
everything in life based around the quality of performance. For example, if an administrator consistently
makes typos and mixes up dates for meetings, then they will likely be reprimanded in some way,
affecting their livelihood. It will be more difficult to move up in the company, among other things.
However, those typos do not dictate the quality of that person. Whatever other interesting and amazing
things about them are independent of how poorly or how well they perform at work. Remember,
professional athletes are professionals—meaning they are employed as athletes. That means their
work, while a part of their lives, is not a part of their true worth as people. This does not mean that
performance does not matter. What it means is that the performance at work does not enhance or taint
who we are as people. Yes, it is important to do your best. But when one’s best does not yield the result
they desire, it does not mean that they’re not worthy of love, acceptance and the like.

So, when you’re sitting around, debating whether a person is a winning player and cares about their
sport when the results are not the best, remember the level of sacrifice and commitment they made to get there, that no one is at their absolute best all the time, and that everyone in this performance-based
workforce can still be a quality person despite not winning every day. Excellence does not require
perfection. Perfection is fleeting. Flawlessness is fragile and we are not made to be fragile.

Check out Episode 28 of Montgomery & Co.: Genuinely Detached wherever you listen to your podcasts.